“The Great Satan”
Image by Desmond Kavanagh
The Great Satan is what certain Iranians call the United States of America.
I risked my camera to get this shot. In between pairs of soldiers circling the compound, i did a quick fire off of this and a couple other shots of the now legendary murals on the walls of the long abandoned U.S embassy in Tehran, Iran.
You may be aware of what happened here in 1979, it’s certainly not the root of the U.S’ problems with Iran, that’s probably as much their own fault, but it was a turning point in the recent history of the middle east. The Iran-Iraq war which followed shortly would have been a whole different affair had the much wealthier Iran not lost international favour and the U.S hadn’t bolstered Iraq’s military. One million people dead, one egomaniacal Iraqi in power and one very proud but isolated nation later and you have the precursor to the shitstorm of this century.
I had heard stories of people having cameras confiscated and film ripped out, but christ, how could i not take this? What a horrible, disgusting relationship expressed so brutally.
Your cheating spouse may not be living up to your expectations of how he or she should act after being caught having an affair. If your spouse is not showing any outward signs of guilt, you may conclude that he is not feeling any guilt or remorse or is incapable of any such feelings. This may or may not be the case as there might be certain barriers standing in the way, which need to be taken down before healing your relationship after cheating can take place.
Disloyal spouse has no clear sense of what marital unfaithfulness is
Your wayward spouse may rationalize that he or she did nothing wrong because they did not have a physical relationship with the other person. Some people don’t view emotional affairs as real affairs. The reality is that your partner’s intimate relationship (whether emotional or physical) with someone other than you was or is draining the life from your marriage as he pours more and more emotional energy into this person and less and less into the marriage. In addition, your spouse deliberately set out to deceive and lie to you. Your spouse not having a clear sense of what marital unfaithfulness involves becomes a barrier to repairing your relationship after cheating.
Disloyal spouse feels that they did nothing wrong
Your cheating spouse may know deep down inside that their behavior crossed the line, but still seek to justify their actions by saying for example that it was just an emotional affair or the person is just a friend. The only way to repair your relationship after cheating is for you spouse to stop avoiding the truth, own up to what he has done, change the behavior and to be held accountable.
Disloyal spouse blocks out their emotions because it is too much to deal with
A cheating spouse is still a person – a broken person at that. It takes a lot for a person to admit to the choices they’ve made and take responsibility for their behavior, swallow their pride and learn from their mistakes. So if your spouse does not seem to be affected by guilt, remorse or understanding, it could be that he is choosing to block it out because the guilty feelings is too much to deal with or he just doesn’t know what to do.
In order for you to move forward and heal your relationship after cheating, your disloyal spouse has to do the necessary work to overcome the flaw in his character, just as you also have your emotions and feelings to work through